Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Proof that Whoville Water is Tainted with LSD

I was reminded today, whilst perusing one of our fine specimens of journalism, that oh my - how the Baroness loves her some Dr. Seuss.

Especially on days like this, when there is nothing else to do while sitting in front of a roaring fire but wax nostalgic. Something like this:

"Oh, now c'mon - it's been this cold before - in fact, one of my earliest memories is of watching out the front door as the wind chill factor made the steam from the mastadon's nostrils plum freeze their snouts shut - damn things dropped like wet bags of sand. Ha, ha, hahhhh - good times!", or

"Now kids, remember that time before when we ran out of firewood? We just put on all of our clothes and started burning Grandma's furniture - and that's why we have no heirlooms left to give you", or

"Ah, winter. It's always been a time where we wax nostalgic around a roaring fire. And we try to quieten down the inner voices that make me want to wallop you with that fireplace poker BECAUSE WE'RE ALL STUCK INSIDE AND YOU'RE DRIVING ME NUTS!!!"

One of my favorite-est non-head trauma inducing winter memories are of Dr. Seuss' "How the Grinch Stole Christmas". And after a day of trudging, barefoot, 20 miles to school in the snow (uphill both ways, natch), I don't have to tell you that I liked to kick back with some cocoa and petite marshamallows, and begin my petitioning for the hogging our singular TV between 8:00 and 8:30 pm.

I usually did not get any argument with the parental units for this; mercifully, there were no siblings to contend with - this made getting my way all the easier.

That and the fact that I'm an amazing master of manipulation and have acting skills up the yin yang.

One of my favorite songs from this most magical of musicals? The one that made my brain once again tickle, just reading the lyrics today?

"Trim up the Tree".

Let's hope you all already have this matter well in hand. In the event you don't (you then win the prestigious BvonB Extremely Late Book Review Award for tardiness) - here are some pointers that will get you well on your way...

Trim Up the Tree
Trim up the tree with Christmas stuff
Like bingle balls, and whofoo fluff
Trim up the town with goowho gums and bizilbix and wums
Trim every blessed window and trim every blessed door
Hang up whoboohoo bricks
Then run out and get some more!
Hang pantookas on the ceilings
Pile pankunas on the floor
Trim every blessed needle on the blessed Christmas tree
Christmas comes tomorrow
Trim you, trim me!
Trim up your pets with fuzzle fuzz
And whiffer bloofs, and wuzzle wuzz
Trim up your uncle and your aunt
With yards of whofut flant
Trim every house in Whoville from the cellar to the roof
Hang up a mile of dafflers
And three miles of snaffer snoof!
Hang dang-donglers on the bathtub
Trim the occupant the with floof
To every home in Whoville and to every blessed Who
Christmas comes tomorrow
Trim me, trim you!
Trim up the tree with Christmas stuff
Like bingle balls, and whofoo fluff
Trim up the town with goowho gums
And bizilbix and wums...
Trim up the tree with bizilbix and wums


RiverPoet said...


LSD in the Whoville water :-D

It was on in HD tonight. I wonder if that enhances the hallucinogenic effect?

Merry Christmas!!! D

Baroness von B said...

Countess D: I am sure that with some of those trippy kaleidoscope glasses and HD, you could have yourself quite the little party!

Warmest wishes for you and yours, dear blend. May this holiday bring you peace, joy and lots of laughter.


Bubs said...

I love that. Our eldest, as a tiny thing, used to insist on holding hands and singing that song the Who's sing around the tree.

Baroness von B said...

Count Tiki: Oh my - that little Cindy Lou Who.

I hope you had the good sense to get those doodads removed from the top of her head. Awkward!

Mental P Mama said...

I love Cindy Lou Who! And your explanation solves a lot of mysteries for me. Happiest of holidays to you all!

Baroness von B said...

Countess MPM: I am quite partial to the Grinch's dog, Max. Best facial expressions on a dog EVER!

Merriest of merriest to you and yours as well, dear blend. May you have a holiday of joy, contentment, love and laughter.


Cormac Brown said...

Why don't I remember any of this? Why don't I remember the lyrics to "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch?"

Baroness von B said...

Count Cormac: Maybe you drank the koolaid...

Blog Designed by Rita of CoffeeShop