Friday, January 22, 2010

Fleet Farm! Friday

For those of you who haven't ever had the privelege to go to a Fleet Farm, let me tell you that is - quite possibly - one of the most fascinating emporiums I have ever laid eyes on.

Part WalMart, part Field and Stream, part Guns and Ammo, part Ye Olde Garden Shop, part PetSmart.

Don't have an animal?

No problem - Fleet Farm can help you grow your own:


Yuh. They're just that amazing.

However...

And this is a big however...

After all my years of reading mysteries and watching crime-based tv dramas I couldn't help shake the feeling that not only is this a one-stop shop for the rural community, it could also be the one-stop shop for a more sinister element....

That ooky feeling started here,

Amped up a little when we got to here,

And had me totally skeeved out when we met some fellow in the crossbow department pushing his cart filled with ,um, cleaning products:

When he and I accidently made eye contact whilst perusing the flourescent lingerie, I went into freak-out mode and pulled out my handy-dandy Cloak of Invisibility:

Duck!!! Blind

And waited until he had disappeared into what I thought was the "Shovels for Digging Shallow Graves" department.

Oh, me and my wild imagination....

Ha ha ha.


8 comments:

Unknown said...

And a little bit Costco and Lowes?

I wish we had one.

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

We have a similar store here called Tractor Supply. Everything from cowboy boots to bird seed to barbed wire fence to, presumably, supplies for one's tractor.

This Fleet Farm does seem suspicious and sinister in its offerings. Perhaps next time you should pack some heat for additional protection behind those Duck! Blinds!

Doc said...

One of my first girlfriends was a cashier for Fleet Farm. She was wild in ways I won't discuss and never want to revisit. You have every right to your trepidation.

Doc

Shelley said...

Grandma J: And a little bit of Costco and Lowes. Only missing is books and feminine hygience products (unless, of course, you're the tough type and prefer the April Fresh scent of Javex...)

Countess CBW: I wouldn't even need to pack heat - they've got it all there: crossbows and 12 gauges.

Count Doc: Sometimes, ignorance IS bliss...

Mental P Mama said...

LOL @ doc. Fleet Farm is my kind of place!

Shelley said...

Countess MPM: It is indeed "Where the Elite Meet".

formerly fun said...

That was quite a bit of bleach. Hmmmm.

Shelley Jaffe said...

Countess FF: Hmmm indeed. Come behind my trusty Duck!!!Blind, and we'll discuss further...

 
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