Part I of a new 'Baroness Sporadic Series' - "Torn From the Headlines Tuesday"...
"Marijuana can cause psychosis in healthy users: Study"
Scientists at the Institute Of Psychiatry at King's College in London made this earth-shattering discovery a result of testing on 22 healthy men in their late 20s.
Namely, the 22 scientists at the IOP at King's College.
Methodology involved giving placebo injections to some subjects while administering a dose of THC to others. It was observed that there existed a link between the active chemical in marijuana and hallucinations which left the sufferers 'unable to know what is real and what is imagined'.
After a post-trial celebration feast of Big Gulps, taquitos, several dozen donuts, nacho chips , 30 Megabags of strawberry Twizzlers and five throw pillows perceived to be giant blue marshmallows, team leader Dr. Paul Morrison concluded "...findings confirm that THC can induce a transient acute psychological reaction in psychiatrically well individuals."
Dr. Morrison's statement incurred the wrath of another team member, Dr. Robert "Bonghead"
Percival-William.
"Pauly, you bloody douchebag. Shut the f*ck up already with all this 'crazy' talk - you are so harshing my buzz - I was just about to make my patented moves on Dr. Sexy over there - that supermodel scientist has been quietly ogling me from her little corner for years!"
To which Dr. Morrison leaned forward into this reporter's microphone and with a raised eyebrow solemnly intoned, "Proof positive."
"The 'Dr. Sexy' Percival-William is referring to is our laboratory's human skeleton."
Namely, the 22 scientists at the IOP at King's College.
Methodology involved giving placebo injections to some subjects while administering a dose of THC to others. It was observed that there existed a link between the active chemical in marijuana and hallucinations which left the sufferers 'unable to know what is real and what is imagined'.
After a post-trial celebration feast of Big Gulps, taquitos, several dozen donuts, nacho chips , 30 Megabags of strawberry Twizzlers and five throw pillows perceived to be giant blue marshmallows, team leader Dr. Paul Morrison concluded "...findings confirm that THC can induce a transient acute psychological reaction in psychiatrically well individuals."
Dr. Morrison's statement incurred the wrath of another team member, Dr. Robert "Bonghead"
Percival-William.
"Pauly, you bloody douchebag. Shut the f*ck up already with all this 'crazy' talk - you are so harshing my buzz - I was just about to make my patented moves on Dr. Sexy over there - that supermodel scientist has been quietly ogling me from her little corner for years!"
To which Dr. Morrison leaned forward into this reporter's microphone and with a raised eyebrow solemnly intoned, "Proof positive."
"The 'Dr. Sexy' Percival-William is referring to is our laboratory's human skeleton."
6 comments:
*snort* I think I know that group of scientists. Did they teach college back in the day here in the US?
Countess of Acres: Anything's possible - these scientific types are such a transient bunch...
Dr Bonghead???? I remember him!
Countess NNG: And exactly HOW do you know Dr. Bonghead?
Are you secretly Dr. Sexy?? Who knew? You should be a spy... ;)
I believe I was friends with one of these test participants in college. He had coily red hair and was known as Ronald McBongHit. He's probably still trying to eat those marshmallows, poor thing.
Love this series of yours, Countess. A nice way to get all the current events without being bogged down in the weed. Weeds.
Countess CBW: Oh, you and your wit amuse me so!
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