Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Worth a 1000 Words (at least)

Sshhhh. The Baroness has a little secret. Come closer to the monitor and I'll tell you. Here it is:
I'm a little lacking in the inspiration department lately.

As of late, to try and kickstart my wee little brain, I have been trying out some "theme" days. I know, I know. A creative crutch - but there you have it. I would choose to limp along than not walk at all. Thoughtful Thursday, How About That? on Saturdays. I've even started to dabble in Teacher Tuesdays. And let me tell you something - the two teachers I write about today have taught me more about life, character, values and relationships in their combined 33 years than I could ever have learned in my own 46 on the planet.

Those of you who have been visiting here for a while know that the Baroness is not one to usually use visual aids. They are not on the agenda; not my bag, man. I would much rather paint a picture in your mind's eye (I'll be careful; I know that the paintbrush could damage your cornea). I'd rather use words. Lots and lots and lots of words. But, after a rather strange and irksome dinner conversation with Duke 1 and Duke 2 recently, I thought it would be vastly more illustrative if I approached this subject in a different way. Here goes:

Most every day of the week, I look something like this:


This is not me, by the way
(although I wish I was on a beach somewhere...)

Yoga pants, a t-shirt, runners, a down-filled vest in winter. Pretty crunchy granola. If I have to be somewhere and have my game face on, I'll choose something like this:

Again, not me - but I do have these shoes (fierce- raWHr!)

To summarize where we are thus far. I'm either in yoga pants, or jeans. Nothing extraordinary, nothing particulary fashion forward. If I need to get my girly girl going on, I would choose something fairly classic, like one of these:

Yet my two beautiful sons somehow believe that every time I leave the house, I look like this:



(I am not, nor I have I ever been married to IceT)
(although I like to drink iced tea now and again...)

And they've told me that they would prefer that I look like this:


(check out the mismatched leggings - edgy!)


And act like this:





Or did they say I should look like this:




And act like this?


(note the fine crafting of the crocheted apron - I could definitely rock this...)

I really can't remember. I was kind of not listening - I was thinking about these:




(Mmmmmmmmmm.)


Maybe they're not such great teachers after all.

11 comments:

Lisa said...

Ahh, hilarious! I knew you were a closet fashionista, dear Baronness. My personal fave ... the wrap dress. It does wonders for my disproportionately small upper. (Notice how I didn't draw attention to my oversized lower?? uh huh, I'm goooood!)

Anyway, work those shoes girl ... you deserve it!! This girl is a shoe hoarder. ... Barbra Peapod

Baroness von Bloggenschtern said...

Which wrap dress were you referring to? The one in picture 5 or picture 7? The only gripe I have about the wrap dress is exactly the opposite of yours (ok, maybe I'm a little more Coco than I think). I always have to wear a cami, or I look like I'm, um, marketing.

And oh, those shoes! So beautiful, so very impractical. I'm sure I would be weeping in pain after the first 2 steps out of the store. Ah, well, I can dream...

Asthmagirl said...

Well done! Excellent visuals!
I'm laughing at the expectations of your teachers.Perhaps it is different having daughters... they continually expect me to look youthful. Silly girls.

That last pair of shoes rocked my world!

Scarlett Wanna Be said...

I am the same way. At home, I am all about the elastic waste band, but at work and church, I am sophisticated and....okay really at work, I look like a teacher but at church, I like to pull it together and get fancy for Jesus...and Big D, you know, so he'll see that I can clean up good from time to time.

Not Afraid to Use It said...

Now, the key is if you can pull of those yoga pants with those heels and that rack all in one go. LOL

Sandi said...

Ha!

My children are too young yet to tell me how to dress, but my husband used to complain that "hot mommy" went off to work each day and "sweats mommy" would come home.

step right up said...

Whoa! Be careful wearing those heels. I could see you tottering forward because of the gals and then breaking an ankle.

My fav dress was the yellow one with the big hat.

Baroness von Bloggenschtern said...

Countess AG: Ahh yes, my teachers. The two who bring the meaning to "double standard" - I don't know where they learned this, but I have to admit that it's kind of nice that they're protective of me and the girls. ;)

Countess Scarlett: As I have seen time and again from your visuals, there is no doubt whatsoever that you clean up very nicely. And I cannot believe for a moment that you own a pair of elastic-waisted pants.

Countess NATUI: If I had that rack, I wouldn't need the shoes!

Countess Sandi: Loved John's line about hot mommy/sweats mommy! Maybe he belonged to my husband's secret society MAWWS (men against women who wear sweats). Big talk from a guy who wears sweats to hockey about 3 times a week!

Countess SRU: My favorite dress was the one one the right with the white top/houndstooth bottom. Or was it the one with the crocheted apron? Can't decide. As for the balance issues, I have decided that to compensate for the altitude of the shoes and the forward balast of the girls, I will be growing a hunchback. Shex-ay!!

Leah Erridge said...

Just wanted to add...
IceT's girl is totally hot.
muahahahaha awkward... =|

Bogart in P Towne said...

Do you remember thinking about what your mom wore out? I do...but usually it was that she was not dressed up enough. I think that makes me wierd.

Baroness von Bloggenschtern said...

Count Bogart: You are so not weird. I know that I always wanted my mom to get glammed up to run errands. To quote Joni Mitchell, "I've looked at things from both sides now".

Man, am I a loser or what? Quoting Joni Mitchell. To a dude. So sorry.
It's the best I've got right now.

 
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